不上面子书是好的，
最起码我不用在这星期做临死的挣扎……
虽然平时已经在挣扎了，
可是临死前的那一断似乎比较痛苦……

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心情怎么怪怪的？

假期要来了，

应该是很高兴才对……

为什么就是无法高兴起来?

总觉得酸酸的、苦苦的……

该去哪儿找乐子啊？

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徘徊在同一条道路上，

走不出来……

每次很怕睡觉……

因为睡觉一定会梦……

我不想梦……

现实生活累人……

梦更累……

我讨厌！

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请原谅近期的我……

这边未完成就要顾虑那边……

脑子不停地转动……

下一秒的事情已像影片那样浮现在我脑海……

尝试让自己静下……

可是在静下的那一刻……

我睡着了……

第二天又悄悄地走来了……

重复第一天的忙碌……

永无止境，才是进步的空间……

难道停下来，就是退步的表现吗？

P/S：大便……

Facebook is no longer be with me...
And I have forgotten that I actually still 'bond' with blogspot...
Plan to post something here...
But I have too much to express...
Just make some selection...
Well, this semester, I have such a miserable days...
I don't know what's the reason...
Always appear in my mind is the bad thoughts...
I m trying to make the days not so annoying...
But still, I failed to make it...
Lingering between the misery, I m still in the maze...
KNS&^%$#@...
I really want to shout out a lotttttttttttttttsssssssssssssssssssssss of bad words...
3 years already gone, yet, I still apply the same thoughts...
Why can't I change my mindset?
Why don't I love my age and my life?
Why m I keep on blaming?
Why don't I reflect myself?
A lecturer asked me today: "Why have you turned into a quiet person in this semester?"
Ya, a good question...
Me too don't know how to answer about it...
My miserable thoughts have changed my mouth into steel...
Hard and heavy...
Sometimes I feel like my speeches are pointless...
And I even have a hard time to organize a phrase...
I have some curiosities in myself too...
"What's wrong with me this semester?"
"Do I really want to be cool and calm?"
"Do I try to avoid revealing by people?"
I m not trying to find out the answers...
Because it maybe too hurts...
All I want is --->

I

Need 

Breathing

忍耐，在远方……
快乐，在远方……

积极，在远方……

冲劲，在远方……

我，在远方……

愕然发现，

你们都随波逐流……

到一个遥远的地方……

喂，飘到远方的，

请不要离我太远……

我担心，

我会将你们遗忘……

把你们打入冷宫……

让你们在我的潜意识里消失……

在我的生命里没落……

那时候，接引我的，

会是彷徨，

会是茫然，

会是无趣，

会是散漫，

会是愤怒，

会是无情，

会是凶狠，

会是暴躁，

甚至，

会是死亡……

喂，飘到远方的，

若你们不停的飘啊飘，

务必要停靠在一个真正的避风港……

请别回头……

因为恶魔不值得被怜惜……

P/S：我只是路人甲，用途是用来充充数……

When seeing the word "My God" or "Oh no"...

Seems that nothing good is happening, happened or will be happen... XD

Ya, it is true indeed...

A long waiting list for me to overcome the new semester...

All assignments nearly assigned to all of us...

The fighters are not ready yet, but the fight will begin soon...

My weapons are still at home... :P

Is thinking that I shall upgrade myself to become a knight...

Riding a horse is much more better...

And faster...

By the way, hopefully I won't fall down and hurt myself... 

Allowance not yet get so I don't have extra money to do the treatment if I fall down... :P  

Bye, I want to have a nap now... 

P/S: Caffeine's days are just around the corner... Be prepared! 

 

昨天到巴生的 Jusco Bukit Tinggi 去逛逛，临去前还向洁士琳学姐示威……结果兜了好久，都找不到那地方……
停下来吃午餐，问路……
靠着一个善心人士所画出来的地图，
我们到达目的地了！
这 Jusco 有三层……

嗯，蛮大的……
停车位多的是呢！
只可惜，美中不足的，
它的地板瓷砖已经膨胀起来了……
多处可以见到维修启示……
晚餐我们则在 Sunway 地带的韩国餐厅解决……
哇，是很饱足的一餐……
两人叫了兩套烧烤套餐，以为就只有烤肉等……
怎么知道，忽然间……
侍者捧着一碟碟的小食上座，桌子都不够放了……
而且还有特别的烤肉服务，真是贴心…… :P
只是有人在旁边，吃得比较拘谨·……
我们好不容易把一些菜肴吃完，然后侍者将盘收去后，
不久又有人拿新的一碟东西来……
哇，我们的心里直喊 “停！”……
原来吃完小菜后，要添加是不必付费的……
可是，何必撑大我们的肚子呢？
餐后，还有甜点、饮料……
价钱呢，当然也不菲……

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很快的，不知不觉，
我谈了一年的的恋爱……
这期间，甜甜蜜蜜、平平淡淡、吵吵闹闹，我们都经历过了……
然而，对我而言，
这是一个成长的过程……
因为从中，
我学会了忍耐、付出、体谅、谦逊……
我会继续努力的，加油！

P/S：万岁！

At home now... :P 

Well, juz now back with KTM...

Had a first journey in Lady's Coach...

Wow, I like the environment in it...

Though the box is still the same, but I like the silence pace...

Courtesy is shown always... 

The most important, I can listen to my MP3 clearly... :P 

Haha... 

The answer is 'Never after holiday!'...
Though busy, I still can breathe well for this moment...
Hopefully for the next I still be a survivor...
Time is always my immunity...
I m still a "L license" holder before approach to the teaching career...
I should spend my time wisely after all...
Do the right thing vs Do the thing right...
Both of them seems same but the aren't...
For example:


Eat
Do the right thing --> You eat when you are hungry...
Do the thing right --> You choose something delicious to eat so that won't feel sorry to your stomach...


Sleep
Do the right thing --> You sleep when you are tired...

Do the thing right --> You sleep on the bed instead of sleeping bag in your room...

Relax

Do the right thing --> You relax when you are tensed...

Do the thing right --> Boys play DOTA or sports and Girls read novel or magazine...

Over all...

Do the right thing --> You may eat, sleep and relax when you are bored or tensed...

Do the thing right --> You are required to escape from the dream that you can enjoy yourself...

Get it? 

Got to go now...

To do the something right...

P/S: Please don't booooo me... :P 

Counting from now...

I still left 11 hours at home... 

After 11 hours onwards, I will made myself in the journey to school again...

I dislike the feeling of staying at home long and facing the moment when the school re-open...

How to describe it?

Really lack of idea in describing the feeling...

I had a wonderful day again before going back...

Watched the International Ice Skating Competition at Sunway Pyramid (In a sudden), attending Malaysia Philharmonic Orchestra at KLCC (Well planned)...

To the skater, you all did a good job and already tried your best...

What you have earned from this competition is an valuable experience...

So, train harder and perform well next time! 

And now I realized that after a skater finished his or her performance, relatives, friends or somebody will throw some flowers, bears, socks, cookies and etc. to the skating rink... 

Well, quite funny when I saw these... :P 

About the MPO performance, still, wearing formal attire...

"Glory of Trumpet" was the theme for the nite...

It was great and memorable...

The songs played were all in optimistic air...

It enlightened my gloomy mood (also known as 'back to school phobia')...

Think I m going to sleep now...

Though I still not yet finished packing my food into the luggage... XD

Nitez world... 

P/S: Head ache... 

 

Nothing special these days besides lingering between d sadness about Joash's gone...
Following the latest news about their funeral and keep Ying Xuan update...
Well, think my mood is having recovering session and it have changed to a better condition...
It is hard to accept a death, but it is a must to accept the reality...
"They have escaped from the sorrowful of life," This is all I m thinking about...
So, cheer up and live with smile every day just like he did for us!
About his gone, again, I learnt about appreciate...
Appreciate what u have gained with no doubt...
Treat the people around us sincerely...
Be grateful to life...
We do not know what will happened next second...
All will be changed in a glimpse of eyes...
So, live with no regret! ^_^

P/S: Laughter is the best medicine... :-)  :-D  :->

星期四上午，一通来自外国的电话号码……

可是我没接到……

＂可能是颖璇……＂　

星期四中午，中华文化营在进行中……

' 1 message received '...

朋友：“Do you know Joash Wee?”

我：“Haha, ya, i know him, y? :-)”

朋友：“How u know him just wonder.”

我：“Oh ic... Hmm, Joash is my fren's fren... Haha, knew him since last 2 years i think... :P”

朋友：“Oh i see. He has passed away due to accident.”

我：“Wat? When?”

朋友：“This morning. Car accident...”

当我看到这则讯息时，我傻掉了……

我愣在那儿，久久无法恢复……

我赶紧检查前几封讯息，多么希望朋友说的 Joash Wee 不是我认识的那位 Joash Wee……

＂拜托，让奇迹发生，一定是我看错了，不可能的……＂

我把消息告诉佩珊，她也把消息传给了颖璇……

原来，早上那通电话真的是颖璇打来的，

她要告诉我的就是关于Joash的事情……

原来，我没有看错信息……

那个Joash Wee真的是那位Joash Wee……

顿时，

我哭了……

对他的记忆，停留在两年前……

那时候，颖璇要到学院拿成绩，后到办事处去处理出国念书的手续……

凑巧，我与他就通过颖璇的介绍认识了……

两年之今，我们才见过两次……

那天吃午餐和晚餐，以及之后到机场目送颖璇登机……

及往后只通过面子书联络……

如是而已……

可是他就能让人留下深刻的印象……

我对他的认识，并不深……

在我记忆里，

他有个非常中华文化的名字－黄仁谦……

仁与谦，乃中华民族的美德……

这美德，完全体现在他的身上……

他爱他身边的每个人，至少我的朋友对他的评价是正面的……

他不会去说人的是非，当要求他对某人给予评价时，他总会微微笑，让疑问从微笑中化解……

他很谦虚，从他的身上找不到半点架子，让人觉得很舒服……

虽然他不谙中文，可是当他与我们谈话时，也尽量用华文……

他的笑容，可以让人温暖……

他精通音乐，时常会参与教会的表演……

车祸五死三伤，毁了天伦，也断了友谊的绳索……

看着报纸的报道、读着面子书朋友们的留言、回想起他的颜容……

我无法隐藏自己的悲伤……

事实摆在眼前，我必须去相信这是真的……

我哭得很凶，连颖璇都似乎在笑我了……

以农历的日子来看，

他跟爸爸的忌日是同一天……

看来，

农历五月份对我而言，

是个伤心的月份……

爸爸、大姨、四舅、外婆、Joash……

都选择在农历五月，

化成为了我的记忆……

朋友，安息吧！

1987 - 2010，是你在世上的辉煌期……

你的精神将永驻世间……

只要我们还有呼吸，就代表我们还有记忆；若我们有了记忆，也代表你仍然存在……

你还在，你就活在我们的心中！

P/S：谢谢安娣的报纸……